Raising children, predicting outcomes?

I am posting a link to a new book on raising children: Hearts and Minds - by Kenneth Boa and John Alan Turner. Here is a teaser from the back cover:

Shaping your children’s behavior isn’t the most important thing you can do as parent.
Shaping their hearts and minds is!

Isn't it amazingly difficult to predict what kids will be like when they grow up? Kids are like and unlike their parents in unpredictable ways. My father and I are driven by many of the same forces, yet we express ourselves differently, simultaneously similar and different.

More than a couple of times, people, who have known me since my childhood, have expressed their amazement that I turned out to be a decent human being. I guess I was a pill.

I know a young man who was an absolute angel as a child. He was very submissive to his parents wishes. He was a very good kid. However, in adulthood, he has struggled mightily.

All this plays in my mind when I attempt to envision a goal for my own children. I honestly catch myself thinking, "I want them to be good, but not too good." How do I pass on to them what is good in me without too much of the bad?

In the end, I think over-focusing on parenting strategies and creating perfect environments is a dead-end street. My kids are going to inherit my heart. The greatest thing I know to do for my kids is pray. I believe that God can use me, both the good and bad, and use environment, both positive and negative to accomplish His purposes. I intend to keep praying for God to grant me a clean-er heart and direct the steps of my wife and children.

Knowing that I am weak and dull, I pray for God to work in me to parent my kids. It is through prayer that I can be more present in the critical moments. Not that I see them coming, but God, who loves my kids more than I, demonstrates His grace by giving me a good word or deed at just the right time. It is also God, who forgives my parenting sins and demonstrates His redemptive power in me.

If my kids can see how much I need God, and from that see how much they need God, then all is well.